Bored Games: Who Killed Colonel Mustard

     Many of you know I recently set up a Facebook account. I've put this off for quite some time, mainly because of my perceptions about Zuckerberg. While my perceptions haven't changed, nor has my disdain for social media, I am painfully aware that as an aspiring music blogger/writer I need to set aside my prejudices and embrace this technology. It has also become increasingly difficult to do many things I'd like to do online without a Facebook account, so I caved. As soon as I'm more comfortable with the technology, I plan to create a Facebook page for Sound Mind. The main drawback I see to doing this is it will make it easier for my wife to figure out how much I'm spending on CD's and records:) Anyway, I bring this up because Facebook has already paid off in regards to my music collection. The first couple days on Facebook, I spent some time "like"-ing things. The Detroit Tigers, Centro-matic, Parks and Rec, John Hodgman, Doctor Who, Flying Nun Records, Lucky Records, the Record Den and Square Records. The other day, Square Records shared that they still had some Record Store Day items in stock. You can probably guess from the title of this post that they had the Bored Games' Who Killed Colonel Mustard 12" EP. So, I trekked down to Akron yesterday to pick it up (along with a CD of Mountain Goats' Tallahassee).
     The first thing that struck me when I got this home was these guys were kids. The whole EP has a board game theme. The front of the sleeve shows a hand of playing cards with cutouts of their faces on top of Sorry pawns. Lead guitarist Fraser Batts' picture appears to be him as a two year old. Of course, the band name is a play on words and the title is a reference to the game Clue. When I flipped over the jacket, there is an actual Snakes and Ladders game based on what could happen with their music career. Square #100 reads "Sell 3 million records". Here are some of the highlights of the game.

Snakes
* Space 15 to 9- Get drunk at first practice/Get grounded for a very long time, thus inhibiting bands progress
* Space 88 to 36- Never have money or parents permission to tour out of Dunedin/Become a cult band or more likely fade into obscurity
* Space 58-45- Argue with The Clean/ Become disowned by the hip set
* Space 48-12- Groupies/Decadence, sin and the ultimate depression

Ladders
* Space 27-56- Band reaches puberty/Contract strange diseases
* Space 79-98- Beat an aging heavy metal band in the Battle of the Bands/ Get hit by their lead guitarist
* Space 6-16- Drugs/A higher level of un-consciousness

Inside the jacket, there is an insert with pictures of the band at what appears to be a high school talent show. When this EP was recorded in 1982, lead singer Shayne Carter was 17 and he doesn't even look that old. Neither do the rest of the band.
     The EP has a Marilyn Side which has a picture of Marilyn Monroe on the label and a Man Side which has a picture of DaVinci's man. The first song on the Marilyn Side is "Happy Endings". It's about Marilyn Monroe and the playing is really tight. Their harmonies during the chorus are fantastic. The second song is "I Don't Get It" which is mainly a Sex Pistols-y exercise for the bassist and drummer, but also really good. The strongest track is the opener of the Man Side, "Joe 90". It's aggressive, cocky, tight and replete with hand claps. It even has a competent guitar solo. The last song. "Bridesmaid", is a nice combination of punk and surf, but mostly punk.
     I really love everything about Who Killed Colonel Mustard from the music to the packaging and I'm jazzed that I was able to find a copy of it. When my son becomes a teenager I may leave this record laying around and see if he takes the bait. Peace.